June Misbehaves

Episode 3

Fade In: Interior.  June, Sheila, and Gerard are on stage holding their scripts as Seymour flails about in his seat.

Seymour: No, no, no for the hundredth time!  How many times must I say it?

Sheila: How about a hundred and one?

(Seymour has a hissy fit and stomps out of the theater with Gerard running after him.)

June: (Horrified): Is he always like this?

Sheila: (Shrugs): If you think he’s throwing a tantrum now you should’ve seen him when his wig fell off.

June: He’s wears a wig?

Sheila: You didn’t think that’s rat’s nest on his head was really his hair, did you?

June: Well I hoped not.

(They laugh.)

Sheila: You know what?  You’re alright.  (Takes out a cigarette, lights it and starts to smoke.) You smoke?

June: No.  Walter did but he smoked a pipe.  I loved the smell of his pipe.  Sometimes I even pick it up and still try to smell it.  I know it sounds stupid.

Sheila: No it doesn’t.  It sounds nice.  You two were really in love, huh?

June: Yes right up til the end.  (She starts to cry.)

Sheila: (Hands her a handkerchief.) Hey, June, whaddya say we get out of here and go across the street for a drink, huh?

June: What about Seymour?

Sheila: Listen, I don’t know about you but I’ve had enough of Tinkerbell today.

June: Well I suppose one drink isn’t going to hurt anything.

Sheila: One?  Honey, it’s time for you to get plastered.

CUT-TO: Interior.  Sheila’s living room.  It is cluttered and dirty but June and she are having a great time.  There are empty beer bottles and an empty bottle of Vermouth.  Sheila is sitting on her husband Jack’s lap and both she and Jack are smoking cigarettes off and on.

Sheila: I’ll never forget the time the Glendale Players did Camille and all one hundred and ten pounds of Gerard had to pick her up and carry three ton Tessie up the stairs as she was dying from consume–

June: Consumption.

Sheila: Yeah that’s it.

Jack: (Stands and acts it out): It was this whole flight of stairs see–

Sheila: (O.L.): Had to be ten twenty stairs easy–

Jack: And he goes to pick her up and he does but he’s struggling–

Sheila: (O.L.): The sweat is pouring off of him like rainwater and he’s getting red in the face–

Jack: He gets to the tenth step and then his back goes out and he drops her!  She comes rolling down those Goddamn stairs–

Sheila: (O.L.): She knocks him off the stairs–

Jack: He goes flying the fairy he is and she lands flat on her face on the stage.

Sheila: (O.L.): They had to call an ambulance and everything.

Jack: I laughed so hard I almost pissed my pants.

June: (Laughing): It sounds like the Glendale Players have had their share of troubles.

Sheila: The problem is that every time we do a play Gerard has to play the male lead.

Jack: That’s because he’s doing it with Seymour!

Sheila: (Warning and looking at June): Jack!

Jack: Sorry but it’s true.

June: What do you mean doing it?

Jack: You don’t know?

Sheila: Jack, that’s enough, huh?

Jack: No she should know what she’s getting herself into.

June: Know what?

Jack: I mean you might be okay with all that stuff but I’m not.

June: What stuff?  What are you talking about?

Jack: I mean she’s a pretty lady.  She might not want to get mixed up in this.

June: Mixed up in what?  What is going on?  Would somebody tell me?

Boy: (Off): Mom!

Sheila: (Calling): I’ll be there in a minute.

Boy: (Off): MOM!  Jimmy’s bleeding!

Sheila: Oh for Christ sake.  (She exits.)

June: Well I suppose it’s time for me to go home.  (She rises unsteadily.)

Jack: (Goes to her): You better go easy.  Sit down I’ll get you some coffee.

June: Thanks.  Jack, what did you mean about Seymour and Gerard.

Jack: Nothing.  I didn’t mean nothing.

June: Jack, please–

Jack: All right but remember you asked.  They’re queer.  Faggots.  Lovers.

June: Two men? Kissing? (He nods his head.) How–

Jack: I don’t know how.  Jesus, I ain’t queer.  Well I do know how but I ain’t going to tell you.  Hell, I didn’t even tell Sheila. Now I’ll get you that coffee.

June: Never mind the coffee, Jack.  Where’s your bathroom? I think I’m going to be sick.

CUT-TO: Interior.  June’s living room.  It is the next day.  She is laying on her couch with the afternoon sun shining through the pulled curtains.  Edna is there consoling her.

Edna: I know it was a shock when I heard it too but it’s theater, June.

June: You should have told me, Edna.  You are my best friend after all although you haven’t been around much since Seymour gave me the role of Blanche.

Edna: I know.  I guess I took it personally since I was the one who invited you to come down and help out.  I didn’t know that Seymour was intent on making a new star.  After all I was Cleopatra.

June: I remember.  Anyway, you can do it now.  I don’t want to be around that kind of atmosphere.

Edna: Oh, June, do you mean it?

June: Yes, I mean it.  (Her doorbell rings.)

Edna: I’ll get it.

June: Thank you.

(We follow Edna to the front door.  She opens it and Sheila is there.  They clearly dislike each other.)

Sheila: Hello, Edna.

Edna: Sheila.

Sheila: When did you become a maid?  (She enters.) June, what are you doing laying on the couch?  We got rehearsal.

June: I’m sorry, Sheila, but I have to drop out of the play.

Sheila: What?  Why?

June: Because of what your husband told me about Seymour and Gerard.

Sheila: Oh for God’s sake.  Jack has a big mouth.  What difference does it make anyway?  It’s theater.

June: So I heard. I just don’t want to be around something like that.

Edna: I’m taking over the role of Blanche DuBois.

Sheila: The hell you are.  Listen, kid, if you want to get out of this house and really get into this world you’re going to have to grow up and part of growing up is accepting some things you don’t like or understand.  Like Edna here.

Edna: I’ll have you know, Sheila, that June and I are best friends.

Sheila: Jeez, June, you really do have problems.

Edna: Is that an insult?

Sheila: Why don’t you go somewhere and be Cleopatra again?

Edna: I was  a wonderful Cleopatra.  Didn’t you think I was a wonderful Cleopatra, June?  June and Walter came to see me.  They are theater goers.  They would know good theater unlike you and Jack.

Sheila: Yeah and what’s wrong with me and Jack, huh?

June: Ladies, please, I appreciate you’re coming by, Sheila, I really do but I think it’s best if I drop out.

Sheila: Best for who?  (Pointing to Edna) Her maybe but what about you?  What’s best for you?  To sit around in this beautiful home–and it is a beautiful home by the way–and do nothing?

Edna: It’s whom and she’s not doing nothing.

June: Edna, please!  I can’t be in that play, Sheila.  Don’t you understand that I can’t be around those type of people?

Sheila: Why not?

June: Well my Mother wouldn’t like it–

Sheila: Your Mother?  What are you? Five?

June: And–

Sheila: Who?  Your son who’s too busy to have anything to do with you?  Your daughter who’s off living her life in Florida?  Who else is there, June, huh? Who?

June: (Grasping): I don’t know–

Sheila: Who, huh?

June: (Hysterical): Walter!

Edna: (Goes to June): Oh, June.  (They comfort each other.)

Sheila: I’m sorry.  I shouldn’t have pushed but like Jack says I’m a pushy broad. (Rises and starts to exit.) Look, I’ll break the news to Seymour.  Don’t want him to be flipping out again.  See you later, Edna.

June: (Breaks from Edna): No, Sheila, wait.  (Sheila turns and she goes to Sheila.  Quietly) I’ll do it.

Edna:  June, I don’t think–

June: You’re right.  It’s time I grew up.  Let me get dressed and I’ll go with you to rehearsal.  Can you wait?

Sheila: Yeah.  Sure.

Edna: (Calling): June!

Sheila: Shut up, Cleopatra.  Your reign is over.  It’s time for a new queen and I don’t mean Seymour.

(POV of June heading up her stairs as Sheila and Edna stand below.)

Fade to Black








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